


Don't Panic, But We May Have Accidentally Gotten Married

by MythicalWillit



Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: Drunken Shenanigans, Funny, Handcuffs, Las Vegas Wedding, M/M, Memory Loss, One Shot, Shotgun Wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-08
Updated: 2015-12-08
Packaged: 2018-05-05 15:02:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5379542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MythicalWillit/pseuds/MythicalWillit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rhett, Link, and a night out in Las Vegas results in some interesting consequences in the morning.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Panic, But We May Have Accidentally Gotten Married

**Author's Note:**

> This drabble prompt basically gave me an excuse to write them in Vegas.

_Ohhhhh_...

Link opened his eyes and immediately closed them back with a hiss. Everything was so _bright_. Why was everything so bright? And what was that sound? It was annoying and not doing anything to help his pounding head. He whimpered a little, blindly trying to lift his hands to cover his ears.

That's when he realized he couldn't lift his hands. He couldn't even move his arms. They were restrained behind him.

Link opened his eyes again slowly, adjusting to the morning light as he took in his surroundings through slightly blurred vision. The hotel room that he and Rhett shared was in absolute chaos. Bottles of beer littered the floor, and a rather expensive looking bottle of champagne was broken on a table next to what used to be a bucket of ice, but now it was a bucket of water. Two glasses stood next to it, both mostly empty. Clothes were everywhere, and it was actually Rhett's shirt that Link was using as a blanket right now. He kicked it off and tried to move his arms again, but they felt... tied together? He moved his wrists about, before he heard a jingle of chains, and his eyes widened comically.

He was in fucking _handcuffs_.

“R... Rhett?” Link called out, turning his body so he was laying on his side, now struggling and yanking at the handcuffs. He looked down at himself with a blush; he was only in a pair of leopard print briefs. What in the world happened?  
  
He heard the bathroom door open and craned his neck to look, seeing Rhett stand there in a short bathrobe, exposing a rather large bruise on his left thigh. Rhett's hair was completely disheveled and he was rubbing at his head with a small groan. “S'alright, I'm here.” He walked towards the large bed and sat down on the edge of it, turning to face the sprawled out man on the bed. “Mornin'.”  
  
“My head is killin' me, man...” Link moaned, sagging against his handcuffs and rolling onto his back, closing his eyes painfully. Rhett looked him over once, biting his lip before glancing out the window.  
  
“Yeah, we had a lot to drink last night, but you're so light it probably hit you harder.” Mind you, Rhett still had a bit of a headache, but he could function. “Do you remember what happened last night?”

“Um...” Link searched his brain for an answer, opening his eyes to stare at the ceiling. Why is silly string stuck to the ceiling? “Kinda...? Bits and pieces. I won something, right?”  
  
This caused Rhett to smile and chuckle, looking down at Link. “Yeah brother, you won the limbo contest. You're so flexible...” Rhett paused before continuing. “My spine would've broken in half if I did half of what you did.”  
  
Ah yes, that would explain the slight pain in his lower back, Link assumed. “I guess I get competitive when I'm drunk.” Link tilted his head to look at Rhett with a smile. “Did I win anything cool?”  
  
“You won more drinks.” Rhett laughed. His mind wandered back to the memory.

 _“Rhett, Rhett I did it! I'm the limbo champion!” Link whooped, running forward and throwing his arms around Rhett's shoulders and giggling uncontrollably. Rhett laughed at Link's antics and held up the man, clapping him on the back and bringing a strong arm to wrap around Link's waist._  
  
_“Good job, buddy.”_

Rhett brought his attention back to the present and took in Link's position. “But uh, now you're in handcuffs.”  
  
Link rolled his eyes, the simple action taking some considerable effort. “Yeah, noted. How did that happen?”  
  
“Well... you asked for it.”  
  
“... Excuse me.” Link stared blankly at him.  
  
Rhett reached up to scratch at his neck, accidentally pulling his robe collar apart, exposing more of his chest. Link nearly gasped out loud; Rhett had small, red marks along his neck and going down to his chest. He blushed hard with realization. Oh God, what...  
  
Rhett noticed his shocked face and followed his eyes back to his neck, coughing awkwardly and hastily closing his robe again, blushing a bit himself. “Ah, well Link, you wanted to be handcuffed. So I handcuffed you. You were beggin' me.” Rhett made his gaze and smiled a little. “Who knew, Mr. Link Neal, likes to be tied up?”  
  
“S-shut up!” Link said in a high-pitched voice, rolling onto his stomach and burying his face into Rhett's shirt with a groan. _Let me just suffocate now, please._ Link inhaled and smelled faint cedarwood and juniper. Rhett's smell.

“It's okay,” he heard Rhett said, and he felt a large hand rub at his back soothingly. It calmed him somewhat.  
  
“We just gotta find the keys now.”  
  
“Great. And where are our phones?”  
  
“Somewhere? In this room? Maybe?” Link felt Rhett's fingers twitch between his shoulder blades. He had to admit he liked the feeling of his friend's rough hands on his skin.

“Mmhm.” Link mumbled. He tilted his head to look up at Rhett, still laying on his stomach. “Anything else you need to tell me?”  
  
Rhett started to fidget, rubbing Link's back more, almost in an effort to calm Link down before he even said anything.  
  
Rhett didn't say anything.

“Well...” Rhett started.  
  
Link urged him on. “Well?”

Rhett's fingers tapped across his spine and stilled. “Erm.”  
  
Link gave Rhett his most insistent look, as best as he could in his position. “Spit it out, please Rhett!”

Rhett inhaled, then exhaled out his words. “Don'tpanicbutwemayhaveaccidentallygottenmarried.”

Link looked at Rhett for a while, trying to comprehend his words. “Come again?”  
  
Rhett leaned over Link and rolled him over until he was on his back at looking up at Rhett, blinking his mussed dark bangs out of his eyes. Rhett brushed them away with his fingers before speaking much slower this time, looking Link in the eye.  
  
“We... got married last night.”  
  
Large chunks of last night came back to Link as he closed his eyes, digesting the information.  
_  
Rhett and Link kissing each other hungrily, with Link sitting on Rhett's lap at a casino table, a group of girls cheering them on._

 _Rhett pulling Link into a sex shop, gripping him by the waist as Link whispered to him his fantasies and his desires, and Rhett promising to make them come true._  
  
_Rhett punching a guy right in the face for grabbing at Link's ass while he was on the dance floor, the guy kicking him in the leg in response. A bouncer breaking them apart and Rhett and Link running out of there before they got into some real trouble._  
  
_A dimly lit hallway. Groping, licking, Link's teeth sinking into Rhett's skin. Deep, guttural moaning. Rutting. Shirts unbuttoning._  
  
_Link pleading with Rhett, practically humping his leg, but Rhett shushing him with a bruising kiss._

_Cheap wedding chapel. Elvis. Ukulele? A priest that was wearing a pink robe. Link with pink roses in his hair and whispering “I do” as Rhett attempted the 3 rd time to slip a shiny ring on Link's finger. A ring that Link felt now in his cuffed hands._

_The cuffs, the bed. Link begging like a wanton whore as Rhett put him over his knee, spanking him, groping him, fingering---_

“Link, Link hey. Come back, brother.” Rhett's voice, which sounded so distant, startled Link back into the present. He was panting; did he hyperventilate? Rhett's hands were on his face, stroking his cheeks soothingly.  
  
“Hush now.” Rhett crooned, and Link calmed down. “It's okay... I don't think he was a real priest, I don't know how these Vegas marriages work.”  
  
Link spoke, his voice a little hoarse. “He... could've been real. What if he was?”

Rhett thought about it for a few seconds, before shrugging and looking down at Link with a little grin. “It would be an excellent episode of GMM.”  
  
Link blinked at Rhett for 3 seconds before be broke out giggling, which turned into hysteric laughter. The entire situation seemed unreal. His whole body was quivering with his laughs.  
  
“Ha!” Link choked out. “I-it would be so funny! Rhett and I got hitched in Las Vegas!”

Rhett leaned forward more, laughing himself, eyes sparkling as he took in Link's amusement. “Let's talk about that!” They both broke down into a fit of laughter which lasted for a few seconds before dying down. Link tugged at his cuffs with a sigh.  
  
“Ah, man... well, at least I got married to you and not some stranger.”  
  
“I wouldn't let that happen.” Rhett said somewhat seriously. “So many people, men and women, were going after you last night. You're... gorgeous. I hope you know that.”

Link flushed with the compliment. “You're pretty good looking yourself. I remember quite a few people checking you out. You're so big and strong and...” Link looked away. What was he saying?

Rhett tilted Link's face back to him with a knowing smile. “And your husband.” He kissed Link's forehead. “I'm gonna go order us some food.”  
  
Link smiled shyly from the kiss, wishing he could touch the skin. “Okay, Rhett.” He yanked at his cuffs and looked up as Rhett stood up, making his way to the phone. “Can you start looking for the keys to these things too?”

“Maybe later.” Rhett's eyes roamed over Link's body, taking in his briefs. “We're on our honey moon now, darlin'.” He grinned wickedly. “And you bought those leopard print drawers just for me.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hahahahaha.


End file.
